+5:43 AM]*
I tried sleeping with music on(frm laptop)for the first time...LoLs...Woke up with Linkin Park blasting into my ear...I distinctively remember chatting with Cass...Dats all I remember doing before 3...Played GunBound alot...
Tokked to aunt Gerri...Found out that she had told cassey's mom about wad a certain person did...BWAHAHA...I got the green light to slap that person...But Since u sed i shldn't, i guess i wouldn't...Unless i get provoked...>=D
No Quiz todae...Too dangerous to try n get..LoLx..(complicated...)HeHs...
Got to know another girl thru gunbound...Complicated...Wun try to explain...Only knows she's 17, in SAJC...Neways gonna get mail from her...HeHeH...
Chatted again...Got to know Cassey's fren, Amanda...Nt a bad girl...LOL...Durno wad to sae...Neways, chatted with Cass alot, on and off...She kept having to go...Tokked to aunt Gerri also...
My bLog entries are getting boring...But its 5.30am...Not much drive left in me...LoL...Conferencing with Alexcia, Alexandra and my brutha...Those two gals DAMN HYPER...They tok so loud...Scream even louder...LoLs...Damn painful to hear them scream at each other...They're MEGA vulgar...
Its already 5.40....Time to end the blog...Ears hurt from hearing them scream and shout...Lols...So yea...Gonna go sleep soon...But have to wake up at 7...So durno if i should sleep...Neways, *YawN* zzZZZ GtG HiDe iN RooM...Maid waking up in awhile...
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+3:27 AM]*
*SiGhS* Tot that she would b bored if i went out the whole dae, ended up I was the one who's bored...She went golf the whole dae...
NtH Much to type about todae...Spent much time looking at ceiling...
She came back around 6,7(?) Chatted alittle, went to watch tv, she went to swim...At 8, came bak, waited for her...Saw her online alittle later, chatted alittle again...
Someone(dun wanna mention him/her at all) is getting in my way and I'm not delighted...
Saw Gerri online...chatted abit here abit there...Went to play gunbound around 12, after WWE afterburn...Continued chatting...Made new fren thru gunbound...She's also 14, sounded pretty sweet(=X)...Waited n waited...Its 2.30(i think), Cassey's online...Tokked to her, she went of becos someone wanted to get in the way again...Determined to give her that slap...Since so many people have encouraged me, I guess I will =D...
Its 3.20 now, chatting again...HAHAHA...Typed out pretty much of wad had happened already...
NewaYs gonna sleep after chatting...GooD LucK on your date arh, brutha....
Congratulations! You're a black velvet!
What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
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+6:02 AM]*
Feeling better...Went to eat when she went offline...
The whole dae was filled with being online and offline...I have officially started ignoring christle...She juz doesn't get it...I told her to give it up, but she din want to...She thinks she doesn't have the freedom to like someone, but with her liking me, you don't think your in the way?I'm the one who can't like a person because of your jealousy...Its not fair...If only...If only you weren't always so jealous...You're the one who's making a mess...Asking you to get off my back doesn't mean that you can't love me*UgH* I'm asking you not to be so jealous of everything...Sometimes i feel like getting aggressive....But i gotta control....You told me the only way you'd give me up was for mi to give u a slap...If its that easy, I wouldn't hesitate....I know you...Its never that easy...Always wanting to use the com when we r chatting, always making a hell of noise in the background when we're on the phone...GADDAMNIT I wouldn't mind giving you that slap...But it wouldn't help would it?I was never yours, and never will be...Go do some reflection...
Always gets pissed when it comes to Christle...*CuRsE AnD SweaR*
If you were to really stop talking to me because of christle, I'd seriously march right over and give her a tight slap...
Neways, I fell asleep for awhile b4 dinner...When I woke up, Gerard and all were already here...Baby Jerome was SOOOOO cute...Feeling moody, din do much stuff...
You sed you were looking for me, and when your sister snatched the com away again, I've had it with her...Juz blocked her n good riddance...waited so long for you...Had a little stuff to do, so din reply that fast...I know you were angry...Sorry...
Mindy,Pebble,Lixin,AhFat were playing mahjong...It ended at 5, kept checking if you had came online, but i guess you were really angry....Din see you online again after that...
Almost 6 now...Botak hasn't woke up yet...(YeP...Sleeping in my room...Nt dat i mind...hahahaha...)Wonder if i should wake him...
Hope tomorrow go's well...Going out with Lixin, hope you dun feel bored cus i might not b home the whole dae...neways you can always call mi if you r...*WinK* LoL...
Gonna do up my blog more....Been wanting to get a wishlist for my blog....
*YaWn* zzzZZZ...6 liaos...Better go n sleep...
Your soul is bound to the White Rose: The
Pure.
"I've been waiting in the dark for a long
time, shining my beacon of hope through the
shadow. If you see me, don't you hide your
eyes from me."
The White Rose is associated with purity, honor,
and chastity. It is governed by the goddess
Artemis and its sign is The Cross, or Agape.
As a White Rose, you are a person of your word.
You may have a strong moral code, but
regardless of your virtue, you always stay true
to yourself. To you, love is the most pure of
emotional forms and it's just a matter of
waiting for it to bless you. Some people may
say you are too idealistic, but it's only
because you don't want to mess things up.
What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla
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+12:00 AM]*
Came home, was damn tired, walked around then checked com, then ate, then went upstairs.Played gunbound, trying to teach Botak how to play...He couldn't play it..Too hard for him...
Started chatting with her...Barely 10 minutes into the conversation, I was lost...I thought she would ask about my depression, my training, ask about me...But I got the feeling that she never cared less...
Came to room...Head hurting alot now...Talked to her again...She told me she was sorry for the pain I'm going thru because of her nt returning my love.I told her it wasn't her fault...A while more, I couldn't take it anymore, my heart felt it was pierced by thousands of needles, and bashed by a stone...I seriously cried a little...(been a long time since i last did)Didn't let her know...i juz lied and kept telling her i was ok...
The atmosphere got less tense...Being good frens would b a good option, so i took it, coninued talking to her, acting that i was fine again...Couldn't help it but later told her about how bad i was feeling...
Neways during training, i wanted it to end soon, so that i could get home, get to the laptop...Now i wish the training had lasted longer...Its only 11 now, almost 12...
Feeling so tired, i wanna sleep, wanna escape the pain.But I know i will lie sleepless tonight, thinking about it...Heart aching more every second, you've hurt me deeply, but I wouldn't blame you...How can i blame you when i was the one who chose to love you?
I want to heal
I want to feel
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I've held so long
Erase all the pain 'til it's gone
I want to heal
I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I Belong
I got a
Heart full of pain
Head full of stress
Handful of anger
Held in my chest
Uphill struggle
Blood, sweat and tears
Nothing to gain
Everything to fear
ALL DAY
STARING AT THE CEILING MAKING
FRIENDS WITH SHADOWS ON MY WALL
ALL NIGHT
I'M HEARING VOICES TELLING ME
THAT I SHOULD GET SOME SLEEP
BECAUSE TOMORROW MIGHT BE GOOD
FOR SOMETHING
HOLD ON
I'M FEELING LIKE I'M HEADED FOR A
BREAKDOWN
I DON'T KNOW WHY
I'M NOT CRAZY I'M JUST A LITTLE UNWELL
I KNOW RIGHT NOW YOU CAN'T TELL
BUT STAY AWHILE AND MAYBE THEN YOU'LL SEE
A DIFFERENT SIDE OF ME
I'M NOT CRAZY I'M JUST A LITTLE IMPAIRED
I KNOW RIGHT NOW YOU DON'T CARE
BUT SOON ENOUGH YOU'RE GONNA THINK OF ME
AND HOW I USED TO BE
SEE ME
TALKING TO MYSELF IN PUBLIC
AND DODGING GLANCES ON THE TRAIN
I KNOW
I KNOW THEY'VE ALL BEEN TALKING 'BOUT ME
I CAN HEAR THEM WHISPER
AND IT MAKES ME THINK THERE MUST BE SOMETHING WRONG
WITH ME
OUT OF ALL THE HOURS THINKING
SOMEHOW
I'VE LOST MY MIND
I'M NOT CRAZY I'M JUST A LITTLE UNWELL
I KNOW RIGHT NOW YOU CAN'T TELL
BUT STAY AWHILE AND MAYBE THEN YOU'LL SEE
A DIFFERENT SIDE OF ME
I'M NOT CRAZY I'M JUST A LITTLE IMPAIRED
I KNOW RIGHT NOW YOU DON'T CARE
BUT SOON ENOUGH YOU'RE GONNA THINK OF ME
AND HOW I USED TO BE
TALKING IN MY SLEEP
PRETTY SOON THEY'LL COME TO GET ME
THEY'LL BE TAKING ME AWAY
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+2:39 AM]*
cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed
What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
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+2:32 AM]*
SorrY BruTha...ReaLLi TiReD TodaE...SlePt At FouR...sO i DiN gO GyM...SeConD AtteMpT FaiLeD...
WokE uP aT 1, I sAw CassEy's MsgS...ShE ProBaBly DiN nOtiCe DaT mY NicK ShowEd I WaS AsLeeP =X NeWays i tOkkeD tO HeR DeN DaD CaMe AnD AsKeD mI tO EaT(WasN'T HappY AbT ThaT), I PuRpOseLy WeNt tO BatHe FiRsT =X
By ThE TiMe i FinIsHed EaTinG n SlaCkeD,It WaS AlreaDy 3!!!DiN NotIcE It WaS ThaT LaTe...WeNt tO ChaT, DeN CheCkeD WitH ZaCh WheTheR He StiLL WaNtED tO Go oUt...nO tImE sO We DeCiDeD tO Go OuT TmL..
EnDeD uP GoiN SunTeC WitH SiSteRs, N HeR FreN...WaLkeD AroUnD...WaNNa geT a PosTeR FoR mY RooM...WaLkeD tO RaFFLeS CitY tO FinD SuM StuFF, OrdErEd TwO TrIpLe DecK(oR WaDeVa ItS CaLLed) FrOm O'BriEns (Mi OldesT Sis WaS WorKinG derE)
RushED HomE CuZ WaS RunnIng LaTe FoR DinnEr...We ShaReD ThE SaNdWicHes On ThE CaR...WheN wE ReaCheD HomE, ALthO ThE DinnEr WaSn'T ReaLLy WaD I EnJoYeD EaTinG, I AtE A LittLe, WanteD tO Go UpStaIrs tO UsE ThE CoM, BuT WaS StOppED bY daD(GRRR) NewAYs, I SaT DowN n PicKeD uP tHe NewSPaPeR AnD WaiTeD fOr hIm tO gO OuT DeN WeNt UpSTaIrs(=D)PLaYeD GuNBouND...DiN ChaT...ShE WaSn'T OnLinE...CouLdn'T ConCenTraTe PLaYinG...WaDs She DoiNg?TokEd tO Terrence AnD ZacH, PLaNNeD WaD tO dO tML...FoRcED tO WaTcH ThE PaRk...DaTs 3 MoviEs iN 8 DaEs...
PlaYeD GunBouND SOme MoRe...DeN I SaW iT!ShE WaS OnLinE!FeLt HaPPy...TokkEd tO HeR...ShE SeD ShE WaNtEd tO TeLL Mi HoW ShE FeLt...I'Ve BeeN WaItInG FoR ThiS, Yet, WheN tHe TimE CaMe, I WaS AFraID...aFrAiD ThaT WhaT YoU SeD WaSn'T WhaT I HoPeD tO HeaR...*SigH* sO I ToLd HeR tO GivE mE SoMe TimE...NoW I WisHeD ShE DiD TeLL Me...
ToLd ChrIstLe HoW i FeLt AfTeR TokkIng To HeR oN thE FonE...I LaTeR FounD OuT ThaT ChrIsTLe PreTenDeD ThaT She DiDn'T HeaR mI...HoW?
NeWaYs WhiLsT BLoGGinG, I StuMbLeD UpoN CobUrn'S SisTeR aS ShE WaS UsinG HiS MsN AccOunT...ChaTTeD WitH HeR n AddEd HeR iNtO FriEnDsTER...
GoTTa SleeP...LatEr CanT WaKe Up AgaIn...I HeaRD FrOm CoBurN's SiS ThaT SLeePinG EaRLy HeLps Mi GrOw taLLer, AsIdE FrOm DrInKinG PeaNuT SouP(I KnEW AbT ThE PeaNuTs SouP) sO ExPeCt tO sEE mE AsLeeP bY 9 FrOm nOw on...YeA RiTex...LoL =X...NeWaYs DiS TimE She'S GoNna WaKe mI..=D sO i GueSS i'D SprInG uP...LoL...
*YaWn* zzZZZ
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+2:48 AM]*
After eating, i went back to chatting and playing gunbound...(yea i barely had a life todae)But I was too sick to do anything.Cassey gave me more stuff to do for her bLog todae, not that i mind...I can't figure out how to add/change the bLog's background music yet but i know i will learn how to soon...
Went to dinner at hawker centre, ate alot of garbage bad for my throat...Rained a bit when we were walking back to the car, Dad slipped on drain cover =X Neways, i seriously think my Mom/Dad's car is way too SMALL to support their family of six...They never think that there isn't enough space, thats because they never sit behind,they get to sit in one seat, without sharing...The four of us were squashed in the back of the car...
Back home, I continued playing gunbound and chatting(yea yea...I dun have a life =P) Chatted with aunt Gerri again todae, mi, Cassey, Gerri(can i leave the aunt out? makes u sound old =X) and my sister had a great time =D...Then Christle came back online(dat means Cassey has gotta go offline...*SigH*)Christle made a big fuss about something that happened earlier...My sister got pissed and started arguing with her...I tried to stop them and luckily Gerri came in and helped seperate them(Thanks =D)...After that i played gunbound some more, then Christle called mi, as usual, the fone was passed to Cassey =D
We chatted awhile then i scolded her for dieting cuz she was already so thin, and she wasn't feeling good due to her dieting >=( Christle was in the background making alot of noise...We hung up a while later cuz she was tired and i told her to go to sleep...
Found out my brutha Zach juz broke up with his gf, feeling very sad...Hey bro, dun think abt it too much, relax...Ur young, can still trial and error...HeHeHe...Dun feel sad...
Dun really feel like going to gym tml morning with Zach, but i seriously need to trim off excess fats and to build up muscles =D...Going to catch a movie with him as well for him to get his mind off what happened...
I betta go and sleep soon...Have to wake up at 7...zzzZZZ *SnoRe*
You represent... loneliness.
Always alone and always sad about it... unlike
angst, you don't have to look for a reason to
be miserable. You want to be in the company of
people but aren't sure how to act when you're
with them. Sometimes you have to make an
effort. You can't always wait for others to
come to you.
What feeling do you represent?
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